Dec 27, 2009 005

Today we took the kids to The Discovery Museum. It’s a little bit of a hike for us, but we were all aching to get out of the house, and we didn’t want the crowds that we figured the big city museums would have today. So we headed west, where the world moves at a slightly slower pace, perfect for a rainy Sunday.

As soon as we walked in the door we were greeted by an expansive train table, which Fynn was magnetically drawn. Lucas stayed with him as Paige and I explored the three floors of fun. A water table, old fashioned diner set up, a safari room, and much more.

Paige and I don’t get to spend much time just the two of us. When we do, she holds on tighter than I expect. When it’s just Paige, she holds back a little. Often she stands and observes the world around her, waiting for the nudge. Waiting for a big brother to come and show her what’s okay to play on, what’s good for exploring. She waits to see what roads he’ll pave for her. When she needs to do the paving, she hesitates. She scrutinizes everyone within eyesight.  Reads people and places before she takes one step. Eventually she’ll dive in, but it takes her a while to test the waters, however warm and comfortable.

I get it.

More than I care to admit, I get it. I, too, wait for someone to pave the way, to make the road a little less bumpy, before I head down it myself. I watch instead of participate.

A lot.

I’m not one for New Years Resolutions. They always end up being a piece of paper crumpled and thrown aside within the first two weeks of the new year. A list of unreasonable goals and expectations. But this coming year, I vow to make changes. To be a participant. To nudge myself when necessary, and pave my own way. It’s possible, and reasonable. I want to show, especially my daughter, that she doesn’t need anyone to pave her way. That she can have faith in herself and that she can reach whatever stars she desires.

This year we will make things happen. With faith, dreams, and a joyful spirit, I will be an active participant in my life.


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10 responses to “Discovery

  1. That’s what parenting will do to you… push you out of your comfort zone and go the extra length for the sake of your child. I get it too. Even though my boy is much more extroverted than I am, we still live in a rather isolated region, so I go out of my way to ensure that he gets his social needs met. It’s not always something I want to do, but I also love the social outlet, so he has really pushed me to keep doing more and being more. It’s good. It’s exhausting. But, it’s good. =)

  2. Those are wonderful resolutions…very inspiring! 🙂

  3. That’s a notable goal. I’m praying for you. 🙂

  4. That sounds like such a neat museum!
    I’m a lot like you (and Paige) in that I require a lot of nudging to get out there. I’m an observer, an introvert, and in lots of things, I’m a follower. Being a mom of a very social and extroverted child has definitely given me a little bit of a push to do more and experience some different things than I normally would. I think your plan to be a participant is a great one (for both you and your kids)!

  5. I am like you, and Paige. I hold back, wait. And yet somehow I have given birth to two little girls from Mars who haven’t a shy bone in their bodies.

    An admirable resolution. Happy 2010.

  6. I was always the one who waited in the background, wanting absolutely no attention on me at all. But somewhere I found a middle ground with. I still want no attention, but I’ve found some way to be an active participant in life. I guess there was a point a few years back where circumstance sort of forced it on me. But I’m glad. It’s kind of nice to sneak around under the radar!

  7. I also plan on making some New Years resolutions with my daughter in mind. I’ve found this year especially that she so takes everything I say and do to heart and I really am paving a path for her. I haven’t figured out what my resolutions are just yet. But I know if I’m “doing it for her”, I will have a better chance of sticking to them.

    Good luck with your resolution… I’m sure when you pull out that crumpled piece of paper at this time next year, you’ll be proud of what you’ve done.

  8. It’s amazing how much we learn about ourselves through parenting our children. I know I have a tendancy to hold myself back on the sidelines, and need to work harder at being more of an active participant in my life (I love how you phrased that!). I think that’s an admirable resolution to make!

  9. What a treat to catch up here this morning.
    You have such a beautiful way of sharing .
    And this so resonated with me.
    I give credit to blogging for helping me along in the out of comfort zone area as well. I remember how long it took me to leave my first comment.
    All the best to you in the New Year.

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