Tag Archives: attachment parenting

Wearing Paige

I completely forgot.

I forgot how wearing a baby, or toddler, can calm a situation. It had slipped my mind for the past month or so how much I could get done at home if I was wearing one of my little ones.

Maybe it was because my beloved Ergo was stashed in the car, and every time I wanted to use it inside… it was ten degrees outside… and my mei tai was in my closet somewhere hidden behind boxes of Christmas decorations and gifts.

This morning, I remembered.

With a clear shot to the beautiful handmade {by my mother} carrier that I caught a glimpse of over the weekend as I stored decorations, I dawned the fabric, and wore Paige. Within minutes, I remembered.

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And I got a lot done. With little fuss, and lots of snuggles.

And even though her stash no longer includes a pacifier, she carried whatever was precious to her, as I carried one of my precious babes.

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With her long lashes brushing my chest, and her fingers clasped around her dolly we moved quietly and swiftly through chores today.

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The walk

We’ve held her for hours

walking her to sleep

curled up in our arms

drifting off into dreams

As her body becomes heavy with slumber

we walk

as her eyelids drop slightly

we walk

We walk to the point where the weight of her small seemingly light body

makes our arms feel as if they could fall off

and at that very moment

she drifts off completely

somehow knowing her parents are at the brink

With warm hearts and heavy arms

we place her ever so gently into her bed

she rolls over, sighs, and snuggles into her blankets

for hardly long enough

The walk begins again

but this time

she’s fuzzy

she smells like baby

and sleep

~ the walk doesn’t seem so tumultuous ~

She’s soft

her skin radiant

and her hair glowing like a halo

~ it might be heavenly ~

Every inch of her is warm

fingertips to toes

and her cheeks feel like velvet

The walk becomes

part of the scenic route of parenting

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(Paige at just two weeks old… at the very beginning of our journey with our now 14 month old)

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Who needs sleep?

Me. And Lucas. Yup, definitely Lucas. Oh – and Fynn. Fynn’s just gotten the hang of sleep so I think he needs to keep that up. But Paige, nope. Paige has decided that sleep is the enemy and she does not want anything to do with it at all.

All babies go through some sort of a sleep regression at 4 months (so I’ve read). Most grow out of it around 5 months, maybe 6. It took Fynn until he was a year old to sleep through the night, and it still wasn’t the norm for months and months.

When I was pregnant with Paige I hoped and prayed that we would get a good sleeper, if there was such a thing. I stayed up at night telling myself that we would have at least one baby that would sleep well. And for four months Paige was a great sleeper for the most part. Then the four month sleep regression, in combination with teething, hit. She just gets worse and worse every night. I’m not joking. Fynn was a difficult sleeper, but never like this. Paige takes the cake. I won’t go into too much detail other than to say last night I think she was up almost every hour after midnight.

I’m a firm believer that the phrase “sleeping through the night” was coined to mock new parents and give them (as well as seasoned parents) yet another reason to feel inadequate. I’m not sure why, but people always ask how your baby is sleeping. I tend to answer honestly and then get looks of shock and disgust when I say “she’s not”. I know too many parents who are suffering from sleep deprivation as badly as Lucas and I are – I know a lot of babies just don’t sleep. Instead of the previously mentioned question, I tend to ask “how are you doing with the sleeping, or lack there of?” because I know that most parents will then be honest and say how sucky (for lack of better words) it is to have an infant who doesn’t sleep. I honestly believe most people lie in order to either brag about having a baby who sleeps, or just not feel like a freak who can’t get their baby to sleep (well, I’m sure that’s an exaggeration, but you get my point).

There are ways that some people train their babies to sleep. None of those methods work for our family. Both of our kids would never cry themselves to sleep, their cries would escalate and then they wouldn’t be able to calm down. And if you know me and Lucas, you can probably understand that we’re more of the gentle parenting types. That’s the route we’ve chosen to go – we kind of fell into the┬áAttachment Parenting category by necessity. It just works for us. I don’t care what other people do, as long as they aren’t hurting their children. You need to do what’s right for your family. For us, it’s cuddling, co-sleeping if necessary, breastfeeding, baby wearing, snuggling, lots of hugs, talking things out (as much as you can with a two year old and an infant), when necessary stern looks and a slightly raised voice, and lots and lots of love.

Ask me at two in the afternoon if I love snuggling Paige to sleep, how she nuzzles into the crook of my arm to close her eyes, how she needs to hold my hand to fall asleep and I’ll say of course! However, at three in the morning (my breaking point) I’ll give you a different answer. But we’ve chosen this parenting route, and this road. It might be the road less traveled at times, but the scenery is awfully nice ­čÖé I love my babies, and I love how Lucas and I have decided to parent them. We know we can’t control a whole lot when it comes to our children, but we can at least guide them in a loving manner.

For now, I just have to remind myself that I can’t control Paige’s sleep, and she will get it in her own time. After all, who needs sleep when you can stay up late and feel your babies soft fingers holding your hand, and smell that wonderful baby smell as your little ones head is resting on your chest? I guess I don’t need much sleep after all.


Who needs sleep? was originally posted on January 21st, 2009 at The Story of Fynn & Paige by moi…

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